8700/1 Q5 description — forest on a winter morning (tutor-set 2026-format prompt, timed, handwritten)

2026-10-13 · check · 1 paper · 15/40 · 38% · not grade-converted

Shape C, 5th timed handwritten Q5 (8, 15, 22 Sep, 6 Oct, 13 Oct). Prompt, text only: 'Describe a forest early on a winter morning. One place, one moment - nothing happens.' Before the timer: four things typed at 13:11 (an abandoned camp, a maze-like cave, a sign in ancient Greek, one shoe); paragraph line given as its own message and typed back word for word at 13:14; plan on paper 13:15-13:22 (5 min set, about 7 used); structure word asked: 'camp' (a place), then 'cyclical' chosen from three offered. Write window cut to 30 min by the clock, 13:26-13:55; photos arrived 13:57 with no message; about 98 words (~3 wpm; 6 Oct ~133 words in 35 min). Whether she wrote to the timer is not known. One named check at 13:58: letter after each comma, reported 0, verified 0 of 2. 0 blank. Marked from two webcam photos of red pen.

8700/1 15/40

0 left blank · Q5 only, description option. Planned, handwritten, timed 30 min. Writing-task blanks 0. Plan in photo: mood 'abandand'; structure line 'forest, cave and campsite' (places, fourth time; 'cyclical' typed in chat at 13:25 is not on the plan in the photo); four-things line not readable; senses 'sound, sight and smell' (smell not used); last line left blank. The paragraph line IS on the plan (top right), first time. One paragraph break, at the shift from camp to cave. Planned things used 2 of 4 (camp, cave; no Greek sign, no shoe). Full stop after 'alown' and at the end of the piece read provisionally: neither is visible.

Q	Topic	Marks	Question	Answer given	Note
5-AO5	W1.5	8/24	Describe a forest early on a winter morning. One place, one moment - nothing happens. (Content and organisation, 24)	As the night falls, you open your bag and see the map. On the map you find out that you are at the camp. A gust of cold wind hits you and you stumble back. You notice that the camp is oddly empty. [new paragraph] In the background you hear a splash coming from the cave behind the camp. As you aproch the cave, you get colder and you feel completly alown Splash! The sound brort you out of your thouts. When you get to the cave entrance you see that the cave is achaly has a lake in it	AO5 L2 lower 8/24: attempts purpose, attempts structural features (splash returns as 'Splash!'; one paragraph at the shift), some linked ideas. A sequence of events, not a description; 'night falls' against a winter-morning task; forest never named; almost no imagery; ~98 words. Cap (12) not reached. Lift to L2 upper: stay in one spot, one paragraph per planned thing.
5-AO6	T5.2	7/16	Same piece (Technical accuracy, 16)	See 5-AO5. 9 sentences, ~98 words.	AO6 L2 7/16: demarcation mostly secure (9 sentences, 0 lowercase openings, 0 splices); lowercase after both fronted-clause commas (6 Oct: capital 'You' x2); one-word sentence for effect. Held by 6 spelling slips in ~98 words (aproch, completly, alown, brort, thouts, achaly), one past-tense verb ('brort'), a last sentence left ungrammatical after a crossing-out, simple vocabulary.

Marks by topic

Ordered by marks lost. These are the candidates for reteaching.

Topic	Name	Marks	Lost
W1.5	Descriptive: one setting, one time, no plot	8/24	16
T5.2	Standard English, agreement, tense consistency	7/16	9