Stopped at her request ("sorry but time is up") at ~11:28, at the planning stage of the London paragraph. Starter: both Ozymandias quotations scored — "look on my works, ye mighty and despair" (words exact, punctuation missing, 'Look on' correct this time) and "nothing beside remains" exact — 2/2 clean, first fully clean starter. Closed both pending items from session 18: closing sentence written unaided ("Shelley wants the reader to think that power will crumble over time") and the 1818/George III context built into that sentence as a 'who…' clause by her after a shape hint, with one grammar slip ('and so he wrote') and 'achent' for ancient. London (Blake) opened: read twice from the CGP guide; one-sentence summary; see/hear answered on the open question ("marks of weakness" lifted accurately); 'charter'd' Thames read as ownership by the crown reaching even the river; 'mind-forg'd manacles' read unaided as people trapped in their minds who could actually be free; 'every' counted (5) and its effect given as making the suffering "extremely common" — but only after the open structural question produced a theme restatement. Chose the charter'd angle, wrote "Near where the charter'd Thames does flow" accurately on its own line; the 'why' line of the plan and the first-draft paragraph did not run. 8 items set, 8 attempted, 0 blank.
UNFINISHED FIRST: finish the London plan — the 'why' line (what Blake wants the reader to feel about the powerful when even a river is owned) — then the first-draft what–how–why paragraph on London, one angle (control everywhere / charter'd), one quotation only, stated as a hard count, quotation already written on its own line first (this runs test #1 on accuracy under composition), no hints, no what/how/why headings. Then exit ticket: London first line from memory + one structural fact. Starter: both Ozymandias quotations (with punctuation) scored — second clean session needed for K4.2 — plus "marks of weakness, marks of woe". Then compare: one both/A/B/so paragraph pairing Ozymandias and London on control. Still blocked on all four set texts — no copies.
London (P1.02) plan stopped before the 'why' line; first-draft what–how–why paragraph on the charter'd Thames not attempted, exit ticket not run. Quotation "Near where the charter'd Thames does flow" already chosen and written on its own line. Open on this.
| Topic | Name | Change | Evidence recorded |
|---|---|---|---|
| K4.2 | Gap → Gap | Starter 2/2 unaided: 'look on my works, ye mighty and despair' (words exact, comma and exclamation mark missing) and 'nothing beside remains' exact - first fully clean run; session 18 was 1 clean + 1 near-miss. Second clean session still needed. Not tested inside a paragraph today (paragraph did not run). | |
| P1.01 | Developing → Developing | Both pending items closed: closing sentence unaided ('Shelley wants the reader to think that power will crumble over time'); 1818/George III context built as a subordinate clause by her after a 'who...' shape hint. Paragraph from session 18 now complete. No new full paragraph attempted, so no second unaided Level 4 instance yet. | |
| K6.1 | Gap → Gap | Wrote 'Shelley, who could not safely attack King George directly and so he wrote it about an achent king, wants the reader...' - context inside her own sentence as a clause, no model sentence in front of her, after a hint on the clause shape ('who...' / 'writing in...'). Grammar slip ('and so he') and 'achent' corrected by the tutor. One supported instance. | |
| P1.02 | Not started → Not started | First teaching, 20 min: read twice, summary ('he walks around a london street'), see/hear answered on the open question with 'marks of weakness' accurate; charter'd = crown ownership even of the river (her reading); mind-forg'd manacles = 'trapped in their mind and they could actually be free' unaided; 'every' x5 as universal suffering after narrowing. Quotation chosen and written accurately. No paragraph, no context, no form point yet. | |
| K3.2 | Developing → Developing | Open structural question on stanza 2 produced a theme restatement ('the speaker is in control of what he's saying but not what he's seeing'); narrowed to 'count every' -> 5 -> effect 'makes it feel like this is extremely common'. Structural point reached, but prompted, on a new poem. Third supported instance, none unaided. | |
| K5 | Developing → Developing | Writer as subject held in both written sentences ('Shelley wants the reader...'). One slip of a different kind: 'William walks through a London street' - poet named as the speaker; corrected to 'the speaker' for events, 'Blake' for choices. |